OMG! Are you having a BABY?

That, my friends, is the question I was just asked by my 5-year-old son. To which I replied, "honey, why would you ask me that?" and he said "well, it just looks like it" as he gazed at my stomach protruding out from under my tight t-shirt.
Great! That is just GREAT!
I take a day off from "the good life" and eat like a rebel without a cause and now I look PREGNANT?
Of course, you know right where I went. Off to the big full-length mirror to give myself an overly critical looking-over. I admit...today...I do look about 3 months pregnant. The only thing is...it's no baby in there Baby! That is a tummy full of cake and ice cream and pizza and pancakes and chicken strips and eggs and toast! Yesterday was his (my son's) birthday and the day was ALL about him. Every meal I ate was whatever his little heart desired. Granted, I could have made smarter choices at the resturants we went to...but instead, I just had whatever he was having.
I also feel like CRAP this morning. I feel bloated and heavy and sluggish. Gross! I forgot how AWFUL your body feels when you give it nothing but JUNK to work with. If I could reach my butt, I'd paddle myself! I need a swift kick in the booty for that! Thanfully, I have given myself a nice, hard mental spanking and now I'm ready to BE the person that I really am. That old me is GONE. Sure she tries to poke her head out every now and then...but I just hit her over the head with a nice, big summer squash and put her back in her place.
I AM A NEW CREATION IN CHRIST! OLD THINGS HAVE PASSED AWAY, BEHOLD, ALL THINGS HAVE BECOME NEW!
oh and...for the record...there are NO more babies in my future!